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When Someone Says They Want to Disappear

For anyone who has heard "I want to disappear" or "I want to die" from a family member, a friend, or a peer. We gathered how to listen, and where to find help, on one page, so that you can read it on your own, even in the middle of the night.

If you feel their life is in danger right now

Do not hesitate to call 119 (ambulance) or 110 (police). While keeping yourself safe too, if you can stay with them, please do not leave them alone.

Call 119 Call 110

About what they told you

The idea that people who say "I want to disappear" or "I want to die" will not actually act on it is considered a misconception. First of all, please take their words seriously.

Opening up about painful feelings takes a great deal of strength. It is all right if you cannot find the right words. When they can feel that you are trying to listen, that is the greatest support of all.

Things you can do

  1. Thank them for telling you. Simply saying "Thank you for telling me" is enough to begin with. Please also acknowledge how hard things have been for them until now.
  2. Tell them you are worried. It is fine to say it just as it is: "I'm worried about you."
  3. Listen without judging. Nod along and listen without interrupting. When you speak, talk slowly, at about half your usual pace.
  4. Gently ask whether they are in danger right now. You do not have to force yourself to avoid talking about painful feelings. Without blaming them or showing shock, slowly ask how hard things are for them, and whether they are thinking of doing something dangerous right now. If you feel they are in danger now, do not hesitate to call 119 or 110, or the lines below.
    (From the Gatekeeper Training Text of Japan's Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare, in our translation: "When someone says 'I want to die,' it is important to check the level of risk, such as whether they have a specific plan.")
  5. Don't rush for answers. Think it through together, and connect them to help. You do not have to come up with an answer right away. Having someone who thinks things through with them is a support in itself. While respecting how they feel, start with something like calling one of the lines below together, or looking things up together.
  6. Keep looking out for them afterwards. Worries are not always solved quickly. Please check in with them from time to time.

Things to avoid

  • Steering clear of the subject, or changing it.
  • Deciding what is right or wrong, criticizing, or scolding.
  • Trying to talk them out of it one-sidedly.
  • Being startled and pushing them away (take a breath before you listen).
  • Suggesting alcohol to take their mind off things (alcohol can make painful feelings and sleeplessness worse).

Where to find help

These lines can be used when the person calls on their own, and when you call together with them. Lines that accept any kind of worry can also help you with your own feelings after listening.

Lines that take calls in English

TELL Lifeline

0800-300-8355
In English, toll free. Hours differ by day of the week, and there is also a chat service. Please check the current hours on TELL's website.

Yorisoi Hotline (for foreign languages)

0120-279-338 and press 2 after the first message (from Fukushima Prefecture: 0120-279-226)
Every day, 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. Toll free. English, Chinese, Korean, Tagalog, Spanish, Portuguese, Thai, Vietnamese, Nepali, Indonesian, and other languages.

Lines in Japanese

#いのちSOS (Inochi SOS)

0120-061-338
Every day, 24 hours. Toll free.

よりそいホットライン (Yorisoi Hotline)

0120-279-338 (from Fukushima Prefecture: 0120-279-226)
Every day, 24 hours. Toll free.

いのちの電話 (Inochi no Denwa)

0120-783-556
Every day, 4 p.m. to 9 p.m. (on the 10th of each month, from 8 a.m. to 8 a.m. the next day). Toll free.

0570-783-556
Every day, 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. Call charges apply.

こころの健康相談統一ダイヤル (Mental Health Consultation Unified Dial)

0570-064-556
Connects you to the line of the prefecture where you live. Days and hours differ by prefecture. Call charges apply.

If phone calls are hard, you can also choose consultation by social media or chat (in Japanese) from the Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare's "まもろうよ こころ (Mamorou yo Kokoro)."

Note: Lines can be busy and hard to get through. If you cannot get through, wait a while and call again, or call another line.

You can also talk with SOYOGI

SOYOGI Care & Support Consultation

From 9 p.m. to 4 a.m. (JST), a certified care worker is at our consultation desk in the metaverse. No appointment is needed. You can talk without giving your name, in text or by voice. You can talk about the person who confided in you, and about yourself after listening. Consultations are currently offered in Japanese only.

For fees, and for cases where you can consult free of charge, please see the Consultation page.

Note: SOYOGI is not an emergency service. If a life is in danger, call 119 or 110, or one of the 24-hour lines above.

For you, the one who listened

Listening to something so heavy is tiring for the listener too. Please do not put off resting, eating, and sleeping.

No one can solve every problem alone. When you are struggling, please talk with someone you trust, or with one of the lines above.

About this page

This page is not a substitute for medical care or professional consultation.

We put it together in SOYOGI's own words, based on the Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare's "まもろうよ こころ (Mamorou yo Kokoro)" and its "Gatekeeper Training Text (FY2024)." We checked the phone numbers and hours against each line's official information on 29 September 2026 (the lines in Japanese) and 30 September 2026 (the lines in English and other languages). They may change, so please see the official information for the latest details.

Last checked: 30 September 2026